Thursday, July 11, 2013

Contradiction and Expectancy

I loved this so much, I had to re-blog from Zen-Haven

Contradiction and Expectancy
(by Stuart Wilde)

It’s a three-fold gain when you understand how contradictions of life affect you. First, you can eliminate some of them immediately.
Second, you can design your life to avoid most of them. Third, you can develop tools that allow you to accept, unemotionally, those contradictions you can’t avoid.
Doing these three things, you return to your natural god-like state, serene, happy, and entertained by the wonder and grace of this strange gift we call life.
How do these contradictions arise?
Most of them are just inherent to our programming. The human personality exists in strange cyberspace, hovering above the ground at five to six feet or slightly more, trapped in nowhere land, some place in the brain.
Strange, isn’t it? We all think we’re here. In fact we are a hovercraft with no landing gear! The human personality never actually lands on earth. Even if you stand on your head, your personality is still somewhere beyond the thickness of your skull above the ground. That sets up an uncomfortable contradiction.
Your personality has to use the body as its link between the infinite cyberspace in which it dwells, and the earthly dimension from which its experiences flow.
The body is finite. Death is the ultimate contradiction. It is natural, therefore, that most people feel a bit insecure.
Life, for many, is a futile attempt to become secure in a dimension that is intrinsically insecure. People constantly fight that, rather than accept the strangeness of the human lesson as a beautiful thing.
We have to embrace infinity inside a mortal body.
We have to learn to love in a dimension where there is so much hatred.
We have to see abundance when people constantly talk of shortages
and lack.
We have to discover freedom where control is the state religion.
We have to develop self-worth while people criticize and belittle us.
We have to see beauty where there is ugliness.
We have to embrace kindness and positive attitudes when surrounded
by uncertainty.
We have to feel safe in spite of our concerns.
Yes, the heroism of our condition is most endearing.
Transcendence is nothing more than learning to accept the contradictions of life without resistance.
Embracing these contradictions is not natural to us. In fact we are taught as children to resist. So, for example, as a small child you were programmed to believe that being wet and cold was a negative experience.
If your mother ever left you standing in the rain, you probably reacted emotionally and cried. Now, as an adult, you may have the same programmed negative reaction to getting wet. Around it hover all the variables : rain ruins your clothes and messes with your hair, rain is uncomfortable as it runs down your neck, rain is cold, cold makes you sick, and so on.
So one mass of energy in your mind says, we have to be cozy, warm and comfortable, to feel positive, happy and secure. Then along comes the rain. Now it’s belting down and you’re miles from shelter. Suddenly circumstances — the cold wet conditions — contradict your opinion or desire.
Now two masses have established a relationship in your mind, each pulling on the other. Negative emotion flows from the contradiction generated by the cold rain. But is it the rain that is negative?
Or is it just your reaction to the rain that causes the contradiction? Water falling from above has no intrinsic quality — positive or negative. When you took a shower this morning you weren’t moaning and groaning.
‘Ah! But that was hot water.’
‘So, it’s the temperature of the water that’s bothering you is it?’ ‘Precisely.’
But what if you just accept cold water as a part of life? Sometimes it rains. You can get angry and resist, or you can relax and just ‘do’ rain. The circumstances haven’t changed — your reaction has.
As soon as you agree to ‘do’ rain and stop resisting, the rain becomes warmer and gradually more comfortable. Eventually, you can ‘do’ rain indefinitely and even enjoy it.
If you have never ‘done’ rain, try this : put out your finest clothes, including your most expensive shoes, and wait. When it starts to rain, dress up and step out, walking steadily, head held high. Don’t bat an eyelid. Have no opinion, keep walking, love the rain, accept it, make it your friend.
The rain disappears, in your mind anyway. While you are ‘doing’ rain, you can amuse yourself by watching others ‘not doing’ rain properly. There’s a bit of fun in that.
If you can’t bring yourself to ‘do’ rain immediately, at least regularly make the ego do things that contradict it. Start small. Take cold showers. Give away your overcoat, wear fewer clothes.
Stop talking about the weather altogether. Don’t comment on conditions, just experience them. After all, when people say it’s cold, what do they mean? They mean it is colder than their expectation. In effect, there is no hot and cold, only temperature that rises and falls sometimes.
All of life’s circumstances, like the rain, are neutral. Life has no particular quality, positive or negative, other than the labels we give it. Never forget that.
Even death is neutral. We have no way of knowing how we might react to death. Perhaps life is really crummy compared to death. The hand-wringing and anguish we suffer is probably all for nothing. I have a sneaky suspicion that graduating from the earth plane may be one heck of a celebration.
It’s the programmed expectancy that stuffs us up and causes us pain. Not the circumstances.
Expectancy sets up the possibility of contradictions.
Yes, we expect the best, but we must learn not to react when we don’t get what we want. If you are diligent, and you concentrate and take right action, you’ll most likely always get the best result. But you must love life and accept it when it doesn’t go your way.
Be heroic, become a warrior. When faced with an adverse situation, don’t react, just accept it. Act calmly. Act powerfully. If you don’t know what to do immediately, do nothing — wait until the answer comes to you.
Be mature and take the emotion out of situations. Act in the strongest way possible, given the situation. You can easily train your personality to ‘do’ life rather than fight it. Don’t be a self-indulgent wimp.
Sometimes life isn’t cozy, safe or guaranteed. If you’re up to your eyes in muck and bullets, first ‘do’ bullets then ‘do’ muck.
It’s so simple. It’s our silly expectancy and the ego’s self-importance that demands things have to be one way or the other. That’s what causes us all the pain — not life itself.
Life is mostly guesswork. You will usually guess more or less right, and sometimes you’ll guess wrong. When you guess wrong, don’t react — love your mistakes, and don’t beat yourself up.
Hey! You thought you had enough gas in the car and you didn’t, so now you’re ‘doing’ walking. So what.
Just walk.
© 2013 Stuart Wilde


  1. INTERESTING.... and thought provoking.

  2. Honora8:12 pm

    Aye indeed. Reminds me of tramping. Many's the time we've been in the tempest or flying snow and we know this is way better than sitting in our living room. Still hate getting a wet bum though.

    1. :D I hear ya. Probably your subconscious remembers the time your mum forgot to change your nappies?



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