Saturday, June 30, 2007

Coff, coff...

I've spent the last few days in the grip of what should be called the 'ab workout from hell flu'. I'm pretty sure that I've managed to cough hard enough and frequently enough to actually cause a windstorm somewhere and for sure my TVA muscles have been consistently and painfully activated at least 50,000 times a day. Late last night I decided against suffering another turbulent night and headed out into the wild to see what I could find on the 'snakeoil and dodgy supplements' shelf at the supermarket - the only thing open at that hour.
Knowing that I had only about 2 mins to get the job done before the next eye watering hacking fit, I speed read (sped read? speed readed?) my way though the bottles of cough mixture, which mostly seem to consist of sugar, alcohol and a few weak herbs (remember, it's not a chemist so there's nothing even remotely 'pharmaceutical' there). And then.. right at the end of the row, a mysterious little white box that looked like it had teleported there from 1945. I picked it up and read this:

The poetry of it.... the stark honesty. I had to have it. The main ingredient is Ammonium Carbonate, which might account for why it smells and tastes like floor bleach. Those nasty bugs went down screaming with the first dose. Hail the snake oil from 1945.


That's it for today, it's late and I need to get in my 8 hours or I turn rancid and lose all my friends through bad behaviour.


  1. Hells Bells. I've tried that stuff too.... it's the pitts but does work. Join the crowd with the bugs mate!

  2. What? With all your food-sciencey cleverness, you couldn't just whip up a cough cure-all from ingredients you had lying around?

    I'm horribly disillusioned.

  3. Oh, and I'm sending you trans-Tasman hugs, you poor thing.

    Be sure to take your Vitamin C and L-glutamine.... yeah, as if you wouldn't be doing that.

  4. Aw, thanks guys. Kek, I do have a cold and flu capsule that I made before ephedrine was illegal. It works great for staying perky during the day but NO good for taking at night. The herb ephedra was used as an expectorant long before someone had the bright idea to market it as a fatloss aid and people started taking it in heart attack inducing doses.

  5. Hey Sara

    I hope you are recovered now! Take care.




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